Saturday Afternoon

A very short story I threw together in 15 minutes a few years ago. Enjoy, and have a good laugh.


Brandon looked up as Jacob took his usual seat beside him. “Sup Jacob.” When he didn’t get a response, Brandon poked his best friend on the arm. When this failed, he snapped his fingers in front of Jacob’s face; then, out of desperation, punched him on the shoulder.

“OUCH!” A few people in the cafe turned to stare as Jacob rounded on Brandon, eyes flashing. “What the hell man!?!”

“Don’t you ‘what the hell’ me! You were the one spacing out! What the shit is up!?”

Jacob’s face turned from one of anger to one of confusion and bemusement, which floored Brandon. “Well…”

“Dude,” Brandon said in a low voice, “What’s up?”

“Well… My parents are getting a divorce.”

Brandon took a sharp breath. “How’re you feeling, bro?”

Jacob smiled. “….I don’t know. I feel like I should be upset and stuff, but… I don’t know.”

Brandon frowned. “It’s okay, you know…”

“Oh, I know,” Jacob cut in quickly, “It’s just… the reason they’re getting divorced. It’s a bit… out there.” Jacob chuckled.

“So… Why are they getting a divorce? I mean, I always thought they got on really well…”

“Well, you see, they had a big talk, and both decided they were gay.”

“Come again?”

Jacob’s grin broadened. “They’re both gay. Both of them. So they decided to get divorced and go on their gay way.” At this point Jacob collapsed into hysterical laughter, which caused the people at the next table to slowly edge away from us, eyeballing Jacob as though he were carrying some horrible infectious disease.

Brandon stared at his friend of several years, not sure what to say. It was good, he decided, that he wasn’t overly upset over it. And he had to admit, the situation was pretty ridiculous.

Brandon could feel the urge to laugh now, both at Jacob’s giggling fit and the absurdity of the reason behind his parents’ splitting up. Not able to hold it in any more, he joined his friend on the floor, and they both laughed until they were kicked out.

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